Reservations

I really shouldn't be allowed to have the job/role/title that I lavishly throw about. It's one of great importance, a job/role/title that should be cherished, instead, I squander the possibilities and hold the responsibility with a grip that lacks lustre.

I used to think it was just apathy and a growing sense of delusion but these are not the only reasons for my skewed performances, it also stems from knowing just how unequipped I am. Not in education or even experience, for no matter how horrendous an experience may be, it is experience nonetheless, it is being unequipped with experiences outside of my job/role/title, an inexperience within life as whole, with great emphasis only ever being placed on specific fractions of life.

What to do?





- I write in order to avoid talking, for you see as a human, I suck at talking.

Location:The downstairs passage.

____________

They'll never know
What he saw
What he found
What he felt

They'll never know
What she was
What she is
What she meant

They'll only know
What they see
What they hear
What they assume
Their world
Their rules

His gain

He presumes


- I write in order to avoid talking, for you see as a human, I suck at talking.

Location:A room with very little hope

A Turbulent tomorrow.

Once this is all over, London as you know it will be different. These moments of supposed chaos are huge opportunities for politicians to grasp fistfuls of power and drive through legislation that would otherwise prove quite difficult. I can understand the resentment and anger that consumes many young people, they suffer from disproportionate levels of unemployment, have regrettable relationship with the law and adults in general and are constantly vilified in the press, all of which are symptoms of a fractured environment, an environment that children inhabit but adults largely create.

With the Olympics less than a year away, an event that has the power to redefine the worlds’ perception of our fair city, London has to be seen as a city that maintains law and order and is able to successfully combat any and all social disturbances. So be prepared, for the events of the past few days will create new laws and grant sweeping powers to institutions that so many are already sceptical of.

Over the last decade, arranging protests and demonstrations has become a much more laborious task but with all the pockets of social unruliness that has come with the many protests this year, we might find ourselves living in a city where they become relics of a bygone era, where past disruptions are used as reasons to prohibit en masse politically charged gatherings which goes against the very democratic values this country supposedly holds so dear.

The debate will no longer be whether we should have an armed police force but it will be whether it's needed for the entire city or only in 'problem areas.' Even the charges that the opportunistic looters of the last few days face will be overhauled; new charges, heavily focused on social unrest, societal threats and domestic terrorism will replace terms like 'breaking and entering' and 'theft’, all of which will result in stronger sentences and an increase in the prison population.

Today officials at Scotland Yard announced that they would be arresting people whom they believe have instigated and fuelled these events via social mediums. Only last week, the majority of people would have been outraged by such an idea but the images that we have all seen this weekend are enough to cast doubt onto the convictions once held dearly.

These young people have managed to catapult their way to the top of the nations ‘most despised’ list and their actions, whether they are aware of it or not, will drag us all into a turbulent tomorrow. 

Three things I learnt this week.

1) More often than not, talking/tweeting/Facebooking only exacerbate the otherwise unimportant and mundane. Try it. Try not regurgitating every quasi-thought and see what sticks, see what holds importance.

2) Moral high-horses often replace logic, empathy and truth. Whether it be scandals concerning media monarchs, or some other worldly trending topic, our aspersions are thrown onto the backs of said horses like a comfy, morally-balanced leather saddle and away we go. A stranger once told me that such reactions stem from a deep-rooted addiction to soap operas, a love of judging others & being able to publicly exercise our virtues. Hmmm.

3) When making Spaghetti Bolognaise, do not use spaghetti, opt for tagliatelle.

Location:Wapping Wall,Poplar,United Kingdom

- I write in order to avoid talking, for you see as a human, I suck at talking. 

Observations.

Several years ago, there was public debate on whether gambling should be legalised in Britain. For some it was a chance to regulate and tax a sinister yet lucrative industry, while to others, it was the last threads of society’s moral fabric beginning to loosen. As a result, there was a bid to turn the historical Alexandra Palace building into a casino, a fort filled with slot machines and forged opportunities. Local people opposed the proposals, believing that such a place would become a hub for organised crime, drug trafficking and men in well-tailored suits with overbearing cufflinks. Residents signed petitions, approached local media and with the backing of a few MPs, had meetings with planning commissions and won and Alexandra Palace remains casino free to this day. But as the locals cheered and celebrated their success with rounds of cider and letters to editors, strange phenomena began brewing in Haringey, an ever increasing amount of bookmakers started to emerge. Whether it be the classic brand of William Hill, or the culturally themed Paddy Power, these establishments began to surface in their droves, so much so that one day, I took a walk from Wood Green to Manor House, a journey of a few miles and within that space, I ran out of fingers on which to count them. 

To live in an area that is one-third fried chicken establishments and two-thirds bookmakers falls into the theorems of conspiracy theorists the world over, that corporations and councils do not have the interest of the public in the forefront of their minds, that providing a landscape of poor nutrition and presenting the idea of financial stability as a pipedream, is social engineering in its most rudimentary form and is only another way of keeping the least among us poorly fed with their retirement hats hung on the results of the 2:20 at Cheltenham. To others, this is just the make-up of any urban city, that there will be areas of deprivation but these areas are populated with individuals who are able to think, infer and make the necessary and relevant choices that will add value to their existence. That there happens to be an influx of bookmakers is clearly coincidental and to believe that a person is a product of their immediate surroundings is as insulting as it is assumptive.

However, in my slightly addled mind, I find the entire situation a deplorable state of affairs that feeds into my plump sense of apathy and disdain, for it appears that what people considered a victory, is nothing short of a well-groomed PR stunt, a moment of feigned victory for the locals and falsified defeat for those above, that has allowed a much more socially acceptable form of the proposed idea to manifest in record numbers.

Today I saw a William Hill, next to a Paddy Power, opposite a Ladbrokes and next to a fried chicken eatery, all underneath a housing estate that is meant to provide shelter to the least among us. The least among us. This is what is considered to be a suitable environment for the least among us.

Three things I learnt this week.

1) People rarely change. If they do, it is not because they possess a more robust allocation of willpower than their fellow man, it is usually because the randomness of their existence has made it impossible for them to remain as they are and so, their inner Darwinian qualities are activated in an attempt to stave off stagnation or extinction.

2) Humans, by and large, are foolish. They love to wallow in pursuits of uselessness that have somehow managed to scroll to the top of their totem pole of importance. This isn't so much a critique of individuals but more of that gloomy specter we call society, for it demands us to be frivolous hedonists, cyber consumers in the race for ever more depraved ways of entertainment and sensory pleasure.

3) Fear can be lethal. right dosage prevents us from simply wasting away in last months underwear in a sea of disused Polystyrene containers & unwashed tea cups. The right dosage can push you through unchartered waters & into new experiences. The wrong dosage can leave you in paralysis, a state that some are unable to shake. Lethal.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone (it's either I do this or bludgeon commuters to death with frowns and coffee cups).

Location:The Den.

Three things I learnt this week.

1) You know you are entering the later stages of you life when you start to talk about your best years in the past tense. There is nothing wrong with a little romanticism of the past but to constantly speak in the past tense, to constantly associate your life with events and people of the past can be a worrying trend. Life, unlike fashion is not cyclical, in fact, it may just be the most linear and tangible idea we humans grasp from an early age. To ignore, postpone or simply develop ostrich behavioural tendencies towards the now and future nows is an understandable set of actions but I cannot help but wonder how much value it adds to one's existence.

2) Never underestimate the human capacity for suffrage. I am not talking about the monumental levels of suffrage that fills history books, I am indeed referring to the bite size packs of suffrage we endure on a daily basis, the annoying pangs of a life unfulfilled, or the gripes of repression and indifference.


3) Watching a woman you are smitten with dance, observing the hypnotic sleekness of her lines and curves, the passion and intensity that fills her eyes and smile, the controlled liberation of her limbs and mind, is by far one of the greatest pleasures of this life.